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A few years ago I finally found something I had been in search of for over a decade.  This prized possession was a school desk that happened to be over a hundred years old and had come from a one-room schoolhouse in the Midwest.  I loved the nostalgic feeling it brought with it of children from so long ago spending countless hours within its confines learning lessons to take them to a brighter future.  It symbolized restraint yet freedom at the same time.

How often do we have lessons in life that we are not allowed to get up and walk away from?  Lessons that feel like they are holding us back from the wide-open world that awaits us as we gaze out that window on a warm sunny day.  Yet, by staying there and taking the time to learn and grow we later realize how important those lessons were in preparing us with a greater understanding of the world beyond our doorstep, beyond anything we had yet explored.

I had such an experience one year ago to the day when I first found out I had cancer.  The life lessons I’ve learned from this tutor have prepared me for a grander world.  Cancer has brought me a deeper knowledge of the importance of service to others.  These lessons have been taught not just by the lessons learned of dealing with adversity, but also by the countless teachers who have been my substitutes when I couldn’t do for myself all that I wanted to.

So, as our school bell rings and releases us for another day I welcome you along as I venture out into the world to see who I can find and serve.

In Others’ Words:

Some measure their lives by days and years,

Others by heart throbs, passion and tears.

But the surest measure under the sun

Is what in your lifetime for others you’ve done.

~ Author Unknown~

Have you ever thought about how a photograph of a sunset could be mistaken for a sunrise if you do not know where the photographer was standing when he or she took the picture?  I love the thought that a sunset, and the ending of a day, becomes the dawning of a new day for another in a different part of the world.  Whether it is an end or a beginning solely depends on where you are standing.

Now, if you focus on the sunset and your life as it was, you will miss the coming sunrise and the opportunities of life as it could be.  Focusing too much on the problems of your past as opposed to the potential of your future will prevent you from turning in the right direction.  Not only will you miss new opportunities, but your back will be turned away on your new day as it’s light bursts forth.  You may still feel its warmth on your back, but honestly, wouldn’t it be better to be facing  and embracing the dawn with anticipation to see all it has to offer you?  The new day brings with it new opportunity and a chance to spread your wings and soar.

In Others’ Words:

When true simplicity is gained

To bow and to bend we shan’t be ashamed,

To turn, turn will be our delight

‘Till by turning, turning we come round right.

~ Joseph Brackett ~

As the Old Year ends and a New Year begins, I assess my own areas of growth and development or stagnant motion.  It is that time of year when many of us reflect, regroup, rethink and rebuild their broken past.  These are often written in the form of resolutions and, in most cases, are made to be broken.  My plan of attack for this year, however, has a different design from my typical “New Years Resolution.”   I have chosen to make only one goal and that is to become the healthiest I have been since I was a resilient youth.  I will not demand more of myself than that, and will do something every day that’s kind to me.  That is it!  This process most likely will take a decade or more to accomplish, but that is all right.  It took me almost half a century to get to this point, so I shall be realistic with the time it will take me to become well again.

Some of you may have the attitude of “Why Bother?”  And to you I give a challenge:  Take control of one thing that you have previously let go.  It could be any of these five areas . . . Physical, Financial, Emotional, Spiritual or Social.  Pick One!  There is an old statement that goes, “Sometimes in the winds of change, we find our true direction.”  Is it time to re-chart your course?

Some of you may be like me, and it will take a SHAKING to wake you up to the inevitable if you do not make changes.  My shaking came not when I was first diagnosed with cancer, but rather when I was told that I possibly had another form of cancer, skin cancer.  Why it took two negatives to make a positive, I do not know.  What I do know is that, “I Woke Up!”  After the results came back negative (no cancer) from the dermatologist, I did not go back to my old, complacent self.  I decided to use the idea of my body breaking down to my advantage and determined that it was time to rebuild these cells that were crying for help.

So, I am going back to school, in a sense, and becoming educated in what I need to do to feed my body well in order to rebuild or repair the broken parts.   By next year, I’ll most likely still be working on this goal, but will be more educated and a whole lot more discaplined.   I do know that this task will be a never-ending process and a lifestyle change, but at least I’ve taken the first steps to accomplishing it.  I’m assuming responsibility and taking control.

More than a decade ago, I wrote a story about growth and development, responsibility and control.   I hope you enjoy it!

LITTLE  SOCKS

Today I listened to a friend reflecting upon a moment he had earlier in the week.  Being a father of four he has many opportunities to pick up things that his children have left on the floor.  This one particular experience was sparked by the simple act of picking up a little sock.  Earlier in the day, the sock had adorned the foot of his dainty little three-year-old daughter and was shuffled off in her rush to do something or get somewhere quick.  It was his attitude at this point that allowed him to grasp onto a moment and be taught a lesson in it.  Most would have been a little put off by having to, once again, pick something up and place it where it should have been put in the first place.  It was his ability to be positive and humble that allowed him to be taught the importance of these sweet spirits placed in his care.  As he stood there with the little white sock in hand, the thought crossed his mind that there will come a time when there will be no more little socks in his home.  This brought a certain sadness, but also deep joy in the realization that his children are growing into healthy, happy and wonderful human beings.  He had mentioned that, as parents, we will look fondly back on our children’s younger years, but in no way would we wish for their progress to stop there.  As wonderful and cute as our children are when they are young, our ultimate goal as parents is to help them grow to their greatest potential in stature, mind and spirit.  And just as we all begin life with small, undeveloped bodies, and minds, our spirits, too, must grow to the greatest of their potential.

As I sat and listened to his words my own mind drifted off to an experience I had just weeks earlier while vacationing in Utah.

The air was sweet with the smell of aspen; it was late in the afternoon and the warm summer sun streamed down lighting the dirt trail I was running on.  My eyes were focused on every footstep in hopes that I wouldn’t stumble on the loose rocks beneath my feet.  Near the end of the trail,  I crawled up on a rock to see the view that I had been told was worth the energy spent in getting out there in the first place.  It was breathtaking!   Looking across a ravine I saw a waterfall cascading down the side of the mountain.  Dark gray rock, moistened by the white spray of mist, created a picture perfect scene.  As I looked down to the riverbanks below, I noticed a half-dozen people basking in the warmth of the afternoon sun.  Focusing back to the waterfall,  I saw two kids at its base; it appeared as if one of them was attempting to climb the rock face to the left of the falls.  From my vantage point I guessed the kid was around 16 or 17 years of age.  He wasn’t wearing a shirt and had on oversized shorts (a good 5 sizes too big).  The bleached, spiked hair and neck choker gave me a sense that he was at a rebellious stage in his life.  As I watched him begin his free-climb (no ropes to aid him) I started to get a little nervous.  The thought then came that surely one of the people at the riverbank would stop him before he got dangerously too high.

After I completed my run, I came back to this location to find the boy frozen in fear one hundred and fifty feet up the side of the rock face.  As I made my way down to the riverbank, I crossed paths with two groups and asked both of them to call Search & Rescue.  I later discovered that the one couple happened to be the kid’s parents.

This situation was life threatening at this point and without ropes there wasn’t much I could do.  On the assumption that one of these groups would have contacted Search & Rescue, I went to find the friend of this boy.  He was attempting to reach his friend from the rock ledge above. After assessing the ledge, I realized that it was very unsafe and that a rescue from above was virtually impossible without the aid of a rope.  I did, however, perch myself on the limb of a tree that was about fifteen feet above the crevice the boy had wedged himself into.  I yelled out instructions for him to stay calm and tried to reassure him that help was on it’s way.  I knew that if he started to panic he would not survive a fall from that height.

From my vantage point I could see a group on horseback that had made it to the base of the waterfall.  I thought they might be part of the rescue team,  so I headed down.  The guide informed me otherwise and I asked him to make a call for help.   It was then Search & Rescue informed him that his was the first call received on this emergency.  I couldn’t understand it.  Did those other people decide to judge the situation as nothing to be concerned about?  If this was the case, their actions could very well have been disasterous for this young boy.  It had already been over an hour since they would have been able to contact Search & Rescue.  Honestly, what would it have taken for them to really see the perilous situation this boy was truly in?  If anyone should have been able to sense the situation, the boy’s parents should have.

This poor kid was stranded on this cliff and was trying to pull himself to the front of the crevice once in awhile,  just to be able to see us.  I realized then that he needed the assurance that someone was there.  I asked a lady who had volunteered to scale the rockslide area to the right of the falls.  She perched herself on a rock near the top and just sat there, looking calm.  This way he could see her without having to move at all and hopefully this would keep him still.

Another half hour passed, and during this time more individuals had hiked in and were watching the event from the slide area.  How could they stand there like vultures in a high tree waiting for the impending disaster?   The entire scene sickened me because I dreaded the thought of seeing him fall to his death.

Soon after a  Search & Rescue team consisted of three men and one woman arrived on the scene.  They were very experienced rock climbers and quickly assessed the situation.  One of them was going to climb from the bottom of the cliff, while another would attempt to reach him from above.  I went with three of them to the base where the most experienced climber started the ascent.

From this point, it was only a matter of ten or fifteen minutes before the boy was once again on firm ground.  As he was lowered, I was one of several to help him to the side, where he was unhooked from the safety harness and given water and candy.  He was so fatigued that his legs couldn’t support his own weight; they buckled beneath him.  This boy, from a distance, had appeared to be much older but actually was only thirteen.  He hadn’t yet hit his growth spurt, so I could still see the look of a young child in his face.  His eyes reflected the trauma of gripping fear that had terrorized him for the past two and a half hours.  I reached over and touched his trembling face and assured him that all would be well.  At that moment, this frightened child broke down in tears, and as I comforted and consoled him,  I came to understand how truly fragile and precious each soul really is.

While I reflect back on this experience, I can’t help but think how little socks are so much a part of this story.  This boy was still but a child, even though from a distance he appeared to be older.  How often do we think that an individual’s spiritual or emotional growth has reached the point of self-reliance and assume that he or she is beyond the need for continual care and nurturing.  We later find out that they were teetering dangerously on the brink of disaster?

As spirit beings having a human experience, we face choices in life that test us along the way.  Those who have found solid ground through their own personal growth and development  need to remember that there are others out there with  slippery shale beneath their feet.  Many of them are hanging dangerously over the edge and do not want us to sit back as spectators just waiting to see what will happen.  We need to do all that we can to be proactive in getting that lifeline to them so we can help pull them to safety.  Whether their appearance resembles someone in need or not, we should not make that judgment call too quickly with or without knowing their situation.  We also should not hesitate to call on others to aid in the rescue when needed.  If we choose to stand on the sidelines watching for an accident to happen, then we too are on unsteady ground and should learn what is needed in bringing us to firm footing and safety.

*    *    *    *    *

As I reflect once again on this story, I see a lesson in the importance of not just taking responsibility for our own personal growth and development, but also see how crucial it is for each of us to not fear stepping up to the plate for others.  Moliere has stated, “It is not only for what we do that we are held responsible, but also for what we do not do.”  Many may not be able to see the dangers of a situation from where they stand.  I do not fault the parents in this story because, for all I know, they had no understanding of how difficult a descent is if you can’t see where you’ve come from and cannot gain sure footing for the climb back down.  Because I had learned this lesson as a child scrambling on the steep slopes of Promomtory Hill in Vedder Crossing, Canada,  I was able to recognize the dangers of the situation before it was played out.

Through my own lack of knowledge, I have also caused difficulty in my life and that of my family.  I had an experience this week where I drove my van through standing water, causing water to be sucked into the engine cylinders, thus ruining the engine.  Now, if I would have known of the dangers I would have backed up, turned around, and stayed far and clear of the water.  But how many of us look at the crossing and feel that it is not that bad even though we cannot see its depth?  In my situation, the standing water did not appear to be very deep and, in my opinion, couldn’t possibly have been deep enough to do anything but make a splash.  My lack of knowledge of the fragile nature of a minivan has left me stranded.

I know that in some ways I still wear the little socks of a three-year-old as my growth continues in many areas.  My spirit is young and I am willing to look at life with those wide-open eyes of a child eager to explore.  As I approach this New Year, I do see reason in taking control of this body and soul I have been entrusted with.  After all, Jean Cocteau said it so well when he wrote, “We shelter an angel within us.  We must be the guardians of that angel.”

As this year comes to an end and many of us take the time to reflect on the events of the past and prospect for the future, I solemnly sigh.  My exhale isn’t a sigh of relief, but rather an emptying of breath so I can reload with a gasp and grasp of fresh air for my next move.

This has been an amazing year.   I am grateful to be on this journey Read more

Most of my life my world has been surrounded by mountains and I have always felt at home in their cool shrouded shadows.  I was born and raised in the early years of my childhood on an army base in the southwestern region of British Columbia, Canada.  This small town was surrounded by majestic peaks that seemed to loom over our township as guardians of the valley, placed there by God to cradle and keep us safe.  I have always felt safety and comfort living in the foothills at the base of mountains.  However, not all individuals Read more

It has been a few weeks since my final chemotherapy and I have come out of the chemo-fog.  So, as I plan out the future path for surgeries, treatments, and so on, I am finding that the choices are not as clear as they have been in the past.  Such as:  “I have cancer?  Then, take it out! . . .  The surgery failed?  Then, Fix it!”  Those decisions were easy choices to make regarding my road to recovery.  But now the pathway remains a bit hazy and unclear as if I’m traveling down a darkened roadway at night and can’t see very far in the distance.  I know the correct path is there; I just have to have faith that I will choose the right road and take the proper steps to do so. Read more

I come from a land far north of where I currently reside with memories of that beautiful land and this autumn season of mist and trees and mountains so majestic that there could be no question that the hand of God has created it.  As the coastal mountains cascade to the ocean and the grandeur of cathedral rainforests reach to the sky, mist shrouds the inlets and valleys bringing with it drops of rain that chill even the warmest of souls.

I have stood on her mountains and rocky shorelines pausing long enough to take in its raw and rugged beauty, grateful to be able to have walked this land that so few have seen.  But now as I ponder it I am more grateful for what it holds captive in my heart.  My dear brother, Danan, lays to rest in the waters below by the inlets where the eagles soar and the grizzlies wander her shorelines which they call home. Read more

Years ago, I remember sitting on an old tractor, all rusted and aged, that sat at the edge of a field.  How amazed I was when I was told that it still ran despite its appearance and that it was still one of the valued, working farm machines the farmer used.  Much oil and constant care must have been part of its regimen to keep it moving along and preventing it from being hauled off to the outer corner of the North 40 where all broken-down and worn-out pieces of farm machinery were placed to rest.  But to the kids who visited the farm, this graveyard of sorts, was a hands-on playground of exploration into the past lifeblood of the farm.

At what point does a worn tool Read more

I was first introduced to a microscope as a child and was captivated by this idea of this infinitesimal world that had existed all along.  A world that was so tiny my own mind couldn’t even conceive of its existence until that moment of realism as I had one eye closed tightly and the other pressed firmly against the rubber eyepiece attached to my brother’s newest toy.

Until that moment, the only thing that was real to me was what I could see. Read more

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